Category Archives: Daughter

RIP Gene Baugh

You were my friend with whom I had so much in common for so many years. You were a rock. I can’t believe this.

Just got terrible news about losing one of my closest gaydad friends in the world, Gene Baugh, in Columbus, who raised his five kids.  I read his autobiography, although I don’t think it was ever published.  He was a huge fan of the Spanish language and had spent time in Spain in his youth.  I flew to Columbus to be in his marriage to a man in 1998, and he and I also spent time together at various gay parenting conventions around the country.  We originally met in 1996 in Minneapolis and stayed in touch quite regularly the whole time, sharing the drama of our kids and our lives before and after coming out.  He was only 56, and a big bear of a man (also very tall).

His daughter, Ruth, who lives on the West Coast now, as I do, went with my daughter and me to our first Provincetown Family Week.  Ruth and I recently got back in touch with each other and today she emailed me with the news that he had been taken off life support as he had requested be done if he should ever be in this state.  He had a stroke on Friday.

Today I started walking 4 miles a day back and forth to BART

Some of the trip is uphill, so hopefully it won’t be too hard walking home for me.  I traveling light with my briefcase, but it does hurt my shoulder after a while.  If I do this, I will be walking well over 20 miles a week, which hopefully will net a significant, healthy weight loss.  While I don’t officially get to wear tennis shoes at work, I have a pair of dress shoes if I need them to change into, and I can’t imagine walking in anything else.

Despite originally protesting, Alex walked with me to her school and I even caught the early train.  I’m hoping this will significantly improve health/blood sugar.

If the timing and discomfort of walking becomes ridiculous, I might buy a bike and a heavy-duty chain, but right now I’m saving money on that and the one dollar a day parking fee.   I don’t even know how long we will live at this location, so this is not the time to make such large investments.

Yesterday after I returned from IBR from the long weekend, Alex and I did a ton of grocery shopping and got a lot of healthy food, which of course is more expensive.  We went to Safeway and I used my discount card, but before going there, we got some basic canned goods at the dollar store near Mom’s house in southern Hayward.  We got to see Nicholas and my brother finally fixed my windshield wipers, which was something that was scary not to have fully functioning on the Nissan when it rained, but of course now it probably won’t rain until next year.  It was nice seeing Mom and having lunch there after not seeing her for about a month while she was in Florida.

DMV red tape

I’m very disappointed that my daughter couldn’t get her permit today because her 18th birthday is coming up too soon.  I paid for a whole course that she excelled in online last summer and she’s had a couple of postponed appointments, but now after all of that effort, she is not able to drive until at least April and her getting a job will be that much more difficult.

More frustratingly, all the money I spent and time shee spent on her driving course WAS WASTED

2009 November and December General Pictures